Just the other night, somebody I love and am close to was having a bad day. She was stressed and tired and under a lot of deadlines. Some of those in our environment got on her nerves, and she expressed some of her feelings in a manner that was shockingly rude.
But my first thought was not to judge!
My first thought was, "wow, she must really be tired to be acting this way."
Look at stresses, not behaviors. If somebody is behaving inappropriately, it's usually due to stress. Whether this stress was planted right now or long ago, it's still a stress.
As C.S. Lewis pointed out, when we get to heaven, we're going to be shocked to find out how much of our good humor was really due to good digestion and general comfort.
Some people when they're not comfortable turn to drugs. Others turn to comfort food, some to alcohol, others to pornography, some to smoking, some indulge in mean and little behaviors. When our lives are made uncomfortable, it's so much easier to be sin. And it's so easy to judge those whose lives are uncomfortable.
We all make excuses for our own bad behavior. We would do well to make excuses for others bad behavior as well! Don't justify the behavior. But love the person enough to understand that there is a root cause behind this behavior, and it's not that "this person is a complete monster."
Isn't that charity?
And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
Moroni 7:45
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